Parenting Agreements When You Are Not Married

While unmarried couples who have children are very common, determining the legal rights of each parent can be a bit complicated. As we at Goldberg Law are both attorneys and mediation experts, we have been able to help many non-married couples work through the legal complexities and arrive at healthy, amicable parenting arrangements that benefit the entire family.

When a man and woman are married and have a child, the law assumes they are the child’s biological parents and both names automatically go on the birth certificate, unless otherwise directed by the courts. However, if the mother of the child is not legally married at the time of the child’s birth, only her name goes on the birth certificate automatically, even if she is in a committed relationship with the biological father of the child. Thus, she is the child’s sole legal parent, unless steps are taken to name a legal father. 

While the birth mother is assumed to be the biological mother, another legal parent is recognized if:

• The parents are married at the time of the child’s birth
• The father is not married to the mother but acknowledges paternity and completes an affidavit, which both he and the   mother sign, to be named on the birth certificate
• The child of the biological parent is legally adopted by a non-biological parent 

When any of these situations exist, child support, visitation, and custody issues are clear. However, when there is only one legally recognized biological parent, things can be more complicated if the couple cannot decide amicably on what is best for the child.

Since unmarried couples do not divorce, the court is not generally involved if they split up. Therefore, the non-legal parent, even if it is the biological father, does not automatically have any legal obligation to offer support.  

Biological fathers

If the father refuses to help support the child, the mother has the right to petition the court to establish biological fatherhood and thus require him to help support his child financially. However, this also gives him the right to petition for visitation and custody. The biological father also has the right to petition the court to establish his paternity and receive the right to be involved in his child’s life, but with that right comes the expectation that he will help support his child financially.

Other interested adults

If the biological parent has had a partner who is not the biological parent but has helped raise the child, that person, unfortunately, has few rights under the law when it comes to visitation or custody. He or she can file a petition in loco parentis – a Latin term which means “in the place of the parent” – if the person can demonstrate he or she has assumed responsibility for the child and has a sustained, substantial, and sincere interest in the welfare of the child. If it can be demonstrated that an emotional bond exists between the child and the non-biological parent, courts may allow visitation in the best interests of the child. 

Finding an arrangement that works

Here at Elissa C. Goldberg Law Offices and Mediation Services, we know that non-married parenting can be complicated, and we work to create parenting arrangements that respect and support the love that you have for your children. With our strengths in both law and mediation, we can help you find amicable arrangements where possible and help you with whatever legal arrangements may be necessary. Call us today to talk about your unique situation.