Collaborative Law Divorce Puts Children First

Collaborative Law Divorce is a non-adversarial approach to settling divorce and other matters without resorting to litigation. In the movies, divorce is fought through litigation, where decisions are made by a judge within the adversarial system of the courts. This system forces parties to compete for who will come out on top. Litigation may seem productive for some legal cases, but when it comes to family matters and your children’s wellbeing, a more innovative option is available. Collaborative Law is based on the principles of communication and mutual respect, which is what makes it so popular in legal conflicts among families.

The two parties hire attorneys trained in Collaborative Law and each attorney signs an agreement to stay out of court while working together to come to resolution. The parties also must agree to disclose all relevant information and use good faith efforts to negotiate. By agreeing to participate in Collaborative Law, the parties are incentivized to come to a meeting of minds on sensitive topics. They must commit to working together and can’t move to litigation without losing their current attorneys, invested time and money. Of course, avoiding the long, expensive, and emotional process of court can be incentive enough. More crucially, the biggest risk for parents taking their divorce to litigation is the damage it does to future communication and co-parenting relationships.

In Collaborative Law Divorce, both parties are represented by their attorneys and still have agency over the decisions made. In the court system, the outcomes are decided by the judge. In Collaborative Law everyone can continually communicate their needs while having control over their interactions with their spouse and more control within the process overall.  Because Collaborative Law is outside the typical calculations of the court, attorneys are able to be more innovative in their solutions and agreements.

This process, most importantly, prioritizes the well-being of children. Because both parties are working together through every step, there is continual open communication. This communication allows for both parties to set their priorities and offers rehearsal for effective post-divorce co-parenting. Lower friction between the parents means a better outcome for children.

Court can be traumatic, and Collaborative Law keeps children out of that system completely. A child specialist (a psychologist specifically trained in child life and divorce) can be hired as part of the collaborative team, which in turn enhances both parents’ negotiating skills and ability to make good decisions for children.

Other collaboratively trained professionals, such as a divorce coach or divorce-trained financial advisor, can likewise serve both parties at the negotiating table. Because both parties hire each professional together, these advisors are able to represent both sides equally without bias. In this way, the parties’ money and conversations are made more efficient and economical. Jointly hiring one advisor assures that all parties have equal access to their expertise.

Collaborative Law is founded in equality, communication, and mutual respect. These principles are what make the practice so beneficial for divorcing families who want to continue respecting each other and communicating for the well-being of their children.

If you’d like to schedule a free first consult to discuss whether a Collaborative Law divorce is right for you, call my office at 215-345-5259.

– Maggie Sjostedt for Elissa C. Goldberg, Esquire